Saying Goodbye...

Yesterday was the second hardest day of my life. I am pretty sure that it will manage to hold that title for the rest of my life. I was very happy to see the number of people, family and friends, who were able to gather on a cold, sunny, Monday morning to help us say goodbye to our son, Joseph. We were thrilled to see the number of people who wore blue, my brother even commented on how nice it was to see so many people at a funeral NOT wearing black. Even Emily managed to wear something blue instead of her signature color, pink. Fr. Rich gave a beautiful homily and Steve & Sylvia sang beautiful music to give Joseph a fitting fairwell.



I want to thank all those who were able to attend, and all those that would have if they could have. A special thank you to Freelance Mystic for the lovely book you gave us. We also want to thank everyone who made a donation to the Ronald McDonald House in memory of Joseph. It helps to ease our pain knowing that we are helping the family of another child in need, and making it a little easier for them to be with their child like we were able to be with Joseph. My family would just like to thank everyone again for their support and well wishes during this difficult time.



For those who were unable to attend, here is a poem that we used on Joseph's rememberance card. It was written for us by one of his NICU nurses. (Thank you to those nurses who made the trip all the way from Chicago to represent your collegues at Joseph's funeral, your presence meant more to us than you could ever know.)

To Our Darling Little Boy

Looking forward to meeting you
How much we longed to see
Your golden hair and blue eyes true
A mix of us, you'd be

Now in this place unwanted
Private pain and open tears
Our broken dreams upon us
We're faced with all we've feared

Our family now will gather
To share this time so sad
We wish you'd had a better chance
To know your Mom and Dad

Our time, not long together
The hurt of this, oh, it stings
But with courage, let our love move back
So you can find your wings

Here is the eulogy that I gave for Joseph. To those who were not there, I managed to get all the way through without crying or even breaking up, yup a reeeaaaal rock, that's me.

Faith and Hope, two words I could have told you the definition of three weeks ago, but I never could have told you the true meaning. Even now, I could not put it into words, but I know how they feel. I felt them the first time I saw Joseph, and I still feel them now, even though for Joseph the hope of a joyful outcome is gone. I do have faith that he has moved on to a better place and that he is with my brother Joe and his Great Grandpa Roy. It seems a lifetime ago that Christa and I discovered that she was pregnant, and I can still recall the shock and joy I felt the day we first saw our babies. This was also the day we learned of the challenges Joseph would face. Christa and I had never thought before this day that we may have twins, and neither of us could have told you if we wanted a boy or a girl. I think now that God gave us both babies because he knew his plan for Joseph, and wanted to make sure that we had Emily to comfort us. I think part of his plan was to help restore my faith in Him, and those around me. The outpouring of love and support from people has often left me absolutely speechless, and those of you who know me well can attest to how rare an occurrence that is. I cannot begin to estimate the number of people who included Joseph in their prayers from the time of his birth. Many of these are people that we have never met, and will likely never meet. To know that complete strangers were so touched by his struggle, and our private pain, has touched me in a way that has left me changed. A piece of my heart is gone forever, but in its place is a patch of hope and faith; hope, that someday I will be able to understand all of this, and faith, that even if I don’t, there will always be love.

We would like to thank everyone here today, helping us celebrate the most joyful twenty one days of our lives. We would like to thank all those who sent us messages of love, support, hope, and prayers, those we know and those we don’t. We would like to thank the doctors and nurses who gave Joseph their best, and did all that they could to help him in his struggle, and comfort us as well. Joseph was with us for only a short time, but he was loved by all who met him. Most of all he is loved by us, and we will never forget the joy he brought us.

We made and passed out these little blue ribbons in memory of Joseph. It was so nice to see everyone, not only wearing blue, but also wearing these little blue ribbons for Joseph.

Flowers for Joseph, from Emily.

(She likes pink. Have we mentioned that it's her signature color?)

Flowers for Joseph, from us.

Now in an effort to cheer everyone up, here are some pictures of Miss Emily Joy! We know, she is not wearing her signature color, but is seen here wearing "Blue for Joseph."